What does the Bible say about Dating?

Spring is here! And with that is the beginning of Major League Baseball, flowers and of course…the dating and relationship series in youth group!! So grab your Bible and lets open up to the book of Hezekiah and look at the rules for dating. Oh wait, Hezekiah didn’t write a book. As for finding a clear, easy to find list of the do’s and don’ts for dating, you are just not going to find it.

The writers of the Old and New Testament did not envision modern day dating practices when the Bible was written. I am certain that the Apostle Paul would have a few paragraphs he would have loved to leave for us spelling out some guidelines, but that wasn’t part of the plan.

However, the Bible is not silent when it comes to principles for romantic relationships. It may not specifically address “should I date or court” but there is plenty it has to say about the type of person you are to pursue. It does tell you how to treat others and defines what true love is.

So though we don’t have “Epaphrous’ Guide to Dating” we do have the promise that God has given us everything we need for life and godliness (2 Peter 1:3-4). Within the pages of Scriptures is the promise that when we humbly seek to obey God and His Word, He will guide us into all truth.

The problem is that we have been so indoctrinated by our culture that we do not come to this topic objectively. One of these days I will write a blog called “How Disney and Porn have ruined relationships.” It’s easy to see that pornography has objectified and demoralized human sexuality, but Disney and other children’s programing are throwing romantic and relational influences on children that impacts their view of life and relationships without realizing it.

It is very clear that we live in an over sexualized and over Romanized culture and it’s destroying relationships. Personal happiness and immediate gratification have become the most important pursuits, which leave people feeling neglected and used. Nobody can live up to these selfish pursuits and they will ultimately destroy every relationship. The only hope we have is repentance and pursue Christ. This is what Peter means when He says, “having escaped from the corruption that is in the world” (2 Peter 1:4).

It is why I preach this axiom: love Jesus with all your heart and He will take care of the details. Look, if you passionately pursue Christ God will work out your relationships. We have this promise, that if we abide in Christ He will work in and through us (John 15). When we love Jesus the Fruit of the Spirit will reign in our hearts and relationships. Read Galatians 5:22-24 and ask, “how would these characteristics impact my relationships?” What would dating, engagement and marriage look like if both individuals displayed “love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control, who have died to sinful desires?”

It would look beautiful and be a relationship that displays the beauty and wonder of God. Though we might have to dig for it, God has left us everything we need to know in order to live godly and upright lives in today’s dating scene. May we ever be vigilant and disciplined in our pursuit of Christ and His plan for our lives.